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Wednesday, May 23rd, 2001
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2:11 am
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| Monday, May 21st, 2001
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1:45 am
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i am shaking
i am crying
i am wide awake
irrational fears
what if i should wake up dead?
the girl i love will never be mine
a car could end my life tomorrow
what if the sky falls in?
you get the idea.
current mood:  anxious
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(2 moments of beauty | Lull me)
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| Sunday, May 20th, 2001
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7:50 pm - Everyone is so near
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| Saturday, May 19th, 2001
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5:51 pm
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I don't feel like talking today
but at the same time i want to
to have some contact with someone
its like i have a fear
a fear of what?
of people?
of smalltalk?
that irreverrant conversation is pointless
that i am pointless?
i am thinking too much, that is certain
i am irrational, that is another truth
i'm just so fucking listless right now
current mood:  pissed off
current music: The Stranglers - Golden Brown
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(2 moments of beauty | Lull me)
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| Friday, May 18th, 2001
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10:59 pm - My girl
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She makes me cry
but its not bad
She makes me smile
when i feel like dying
She is mine
and i am hers.
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(Lull me)
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| Thursday, May 17th, 2001
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9:50 pm
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The sweeping sadness has returned.
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(Lull me)
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8:11 pm
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4:32 pm
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"But despite my confusion
I've come to the conclusion
that people, need people
And its something i forget
but i've come to accept
that people need people"
current mood: Fine
current music: Day One - I'm Doing Fine
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(Lull me)
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| Wednesday, May 16th, 2001
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12:44 am
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| Tuesday, May 15th, 2001
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6:31 pm
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Nothing was acomplished today
I am tired and want to sleep
but can see no reason why i would
i never bow down to my body
never.
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(2 moments of beauty | Lull me)
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| Monday, May 14th, 2001
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11:22 pm
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I gave her phone sex this evening
and listened to her gasps, her sighs
her breathing
we laughed after
her mother
she almost caught her
masturbating
over this boy
on a phone.
and i smiled.
current mood:  surprised
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(20 moments of beauty | Lull me)
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| Sunday, May 13th, 2001
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11:14 pm
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"Since you ask, most days I cannot remember.
I walk in my clothing, unmarked by that voyage.
Then the almost unnameable lust returns."
--Anne Sexton
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(Lull me)
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10:51 pm
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A place with people,
sounds of laugher
glimpses of smiles
and me
i pretended to smile
and i laughed
but i didn't mean any of them.
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(Lull me)
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1:56 pm
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Warning
Live without Warning.
yes.
current mood:  okay
current music: Green Day - Warning
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(Lull me)
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3:25 am
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And so begins something new
a fresh canvas to corrupt
another chance to purify
my mind
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(Lull me)
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youthinkmecrazy's journal